Since the beginning of time, women have been portrayed as being delicate creatures. They were only supposed to be seen and not heard. It took centuries for women to even gain the right to vote, in addition to joining the workforce and doing something more beneficial than your stereotypical cooking and cleaning remedies. While we are in the 21st century and have come quite a long way, society still has that same mentality that women are supposed to uphold a certain image and set of morals. Anything short of that proper behavior is considered unacceptable, all thanks to the stud/slut paradox that we’re living in.
I hate to break it to you boys, or should I say ‘studs?’ Those of you who are looking for that constant hookup need girls who want the same thing too. Just remember, it takes two to tango. Although somehow, we tend to forget that aspect of it all and strictly focus on the slut-shaming of women. According to the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, it was shown that “sexually permissive women are ostracized for being considered ‘easy,’ whereas men with a high number of sexual partners are viewed with a sense of accomplishment.” So basically, a woman has sex with a guy and she is classified as the biggest whore in the world. However, when a man does it, he practically gets high fives all around from his friends like he just scored the winning touchdown at the football game.
A study conducted by Business Insider had proved that young girls who become sexually active are losing friends, and boys of the same age who are also having sex are gaining friends. Times are changing, and that double standard should no longer exist. We need to get over this whole conception that women should have more sexual restraints than men do. If anything, we should be praising gender equality. It is 2015, which means a man is not automatically entitled to a woman’s body. Did I mention that it is 2015? This also means that having sex with different partners does not make a woman ‘dirty’ in any way, shape, or form, especially if the proper protection is being used. Contrary to popular belief, you do not lose a sense of your moral compass by having sex.
Who decides what is considered too many sexual partners anyway? Is there a promiscuity radar that I am unaware of? If we are going to sit here and ridicule women for the amount of sexual partners they choose to have, then it is only fair that both genders are held accountable for their actions. We are forgetting that sex is a desire that is part of life no matter what gender you are. This double standard also brings to life the idea that men are the only ones out there who are capable of having unemotional sex.
Even the media has portrayed this ridiculous logic. In the movie, John Tucker Must Die, John Tucker is found dating multiple women at the same time, yet women are still down on their knees, begging for a chance to be with him. On the television series, Sex and the City, Samantha’s character is a sexually liberated woman; however, she gets criticized left and right by her peers because her behavior is considered unacceptable for someone of her gender. In reality, she is doing nothing differently than John Tucker, yet she is the one receiving all of the backlash. It is pretty evident that both men and women are perfectly capable of catching feelings, something that is not exclusive to just females.
Someone shared this quote with me the other day. “If a key opens lots of locks, it is a master-key. But, if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it is a shitty lock.” This completely justifies the entire double standard of men and women to a T. When are we actually going to take women off of this pedestal where they can only be viewed as pure and virginal? When you demean someone else’s self-esteem within their sexuality, which includes slut-shaming, you are actually demeaning the female gender entirely. You also cannot have two people of the opposite gender doing the same thing, but only label one of them as a degenerate.
Your college experience is supposed to be the best and most memorable years of your life. You are bound to have your fair share of random hookups, one night stands, and innocent fun. I am not saying that every female out there should go sleep around with anyone and everyone, but rather than being so quick to judge a woman’s outward expression, try to relate with her inward expression instead. Understand that we all deal with sexual expression and personal choice in our own way. This should never be classified as a shameful act, but human nature. While our genetic makeup physically makes us different from males, we are still people who have needs and feelings too, and those needs and feelings deserve the utmost respect.